Complicated Stuff

Sobriety is some complicated stuff.

I have been trying to get a handle on all of this for just over seven months. I have learned a boatload of stuff - about my addiction and about my sobriety. I read others' blogs and network with other alcoholics. I am constantly in the Big Book and the Little Red Book. Lots of reading to gain a more complete understanding of my higher power. AND I know I am just starting.

I think these first steps and first months are probably the most important because they are setting up how I will treat the rest of my sobriety.

It is serious. That is how I treat my sobriety. It is the most serious and important thing in my life. It is life changing. It is life saving. It is eye opening. It is also impacting more lives than just my own.

This is big stuff.

There is no KISS (keep it simple, stupid) philosophy in my plan. If there is a simple part I haven't found it yet. I found my addiction to be very complicated. It permeated every facet of my being. Almost every aspect of my life eventually revolved around addiction.

I don't see anything simple about relearning how to live - this time without my crutch. I think some people might simplify things and just look toward meetings and 12 steps as their elixir. I use them too, but I need to have more and I spend a lot of my time listening to what others have found.

Gratitude has helped me tons. Learning gratitude helps keep things in proper perspective for me. I just love reading the gratitude blogs. Nice and uplifting.

Making amends is very important to me too. Lots to think about there.

The hardest has been forgiveness. I broke this into three parts. Forgiving those who hurt me, asking for forgiveness, and forgiving myself.

This has been a whole lot to get done in this short amount of time. The exciting thing about all of this is I can see the direction I am going. It has been overwhelming and slow at first, but I can see up the hill.

Maybe the simplicity is taking it all just one step at a time, huh?